Baby Turned Thirteen

5 Months ago I sat on my couch bawling my eyes out that I would miss today. That was not the plan, and for that I am grateful. At the same time, God had some wicked plan that I would however be in mega pain today. Guess we can’t have EVERYTHING we want. I actually had slept like a princess. I took some Flexoril and some Melatonin before bed, the doctor said to, and BAM. I was out for most of the night, maybe got up a couple of times. But when I woke up to sing our traditional birthday song, I couldn’t! “Today it is your birthday and we sing to let you know that you will be queen for the day, whatever you say goes!” My insane planning was thwarted this week. I had no outfit or crown for Madison, the one thing she picked as her birthday breakfast we didn’t have, and my head felt as if it were splitting open. For four hours I was in pain. Pain I have never felt before in my head. I cried. It was unfair and too much. Skip looked at me at one point, “when do we go to the hospital?” “NOOO!!! MY daughter turns 13!!!” I tried all my meds and was hiding under a heating pad. It felt a little better, and then I called the doctor on call. I got a call back over four hours from the start of these shannanigans and she said that if I felt the headache start up to take narcotics. It seemed like the Beet/Apple/Carrot juice I had made the night before, did the trick. I drank strong cups of coffee, anything I could do to get my brain to stop hurting. Like I said, it finally did. At the same time, my neighbor Lesley and her kids went in to full “Take care of the Wall family mode.” It was good. Alana was covered, they picked up pizza and drinks, Madison played in the woods with her buddies, and I tried to get better. It is so nice to have people literally drop everything for us to help in times like this. It was so needed. I watched Skip and dad finally finish the room and out back to sit we went. It was nice, I called Madison home, and she was confused. I now know she was also thinking that this was the worst 13^th birthday ever. Mom is sick, my traditions aren’t going as planned, I  was kicked out of my room, etc. Then all of a sudden, friends start coming up and filling our yard. She said it was awesome. She had NO idea that they were coming over! She knew her family was, but not her friends and the day began to brighten. Mom wasn’t in pain, her friends are here, and Brooklyn Joes pizza is happening for the third night in a row. The best part was the room reveal. Skip decided to let her choose the room and of course she chose hers. She was blown away! We’ve talked about it all night. She had an idea, but thought she still had bunk beads at least. And that I maybe painted something gray because it was on my shirt, but that it might have been an old shirt. It was fun to hear her thoughts! I told her how I got the ideas, how we had everyone chip in, how cool it is to have two areas, and everything. She loves it so much and just keeps smiling. Said she will keep it clean too… that I don’t know about. So all in all, it was an amazing little day, mom made it to 13 and we enjoyed having everyone over and celebrating 13 awesome years.

Now, for tomorrow, we aren’t quite sure what that hold, but I would be lying if I said I wasn’t nervous. I had melting vision 3 times in the past 2 days. My head felt worse than anything I’ve ever experienced. I think my body is mad angry with LM and no matter what I did today it didn’t respond. So tomorrow is a new day, when they’re all off to school, I’ll start making phone calls. I’m guessing we are going to get in a whole lot quicker now. Hoping to God I make it through the night and don’t have to spend time in the ER. I took some Ativan and Tylenol and hope to see tomorrow is a good day. Like I said, I’ve never felt anything like I did today, and would most rather not feel that again. Just looking up and holding onto hope.

Madison tonight said, “mom, you had to make it. Your mom.” That made me smile. She’s right, just had to.